Opentalk International

How Talking makes one feel good

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If you or someone you know is going through a tough time, talking to someone might sound like a simplistic solution, but it is one of the best possible things you/they can do.

Sorting through your feelings

Talking out loud about what’s going on in your head and explaining it to someone else, even if you think it doesn’t make sense, helps you to clarify the things that are worrying you. Saying things out loud, often makes them less scary, and at least by having to sort through your feelings you know a bit more about you’re dealing with. Keeping things inside only lets them build up and get confusing.

Putting things in perspective

If you have been keeping things to yourself, a situation can seem way more overwhelming than it is. The person you tell might help you see the case in a new or different perspective.
Someone outside the situation will be able to be more objective about what’s going on and might have solutions you hadn’t thought of.

Releasing tension

You mightn’t even realize it, but carrying a worried head on your shoulders every day, full of pent-up emotions, creates a lot of physical stress too. You’d be amazed at what a release it can be to get things off your chest. Your muscles can relax a bit, and you can feel like a weight has been lifted. Feeling good physically makes you feel better mentally. It’s all connected, see?

Deciding who to talk to

Choosing who you want to talk to is an essential first step. You need to trust them, and to feel comfortable opening up to them. The possibilities include close friends (who might relate to what you’re going through) family members (who can sometimes give you great support), teachers or youth workers (who are often good listeners and trained to deal with loads of issues), or going to talk to a counsellor who’s outside the situation (sometimes the best plan).

Talking to someone outside the situation

One of the advantages of talking to someone like a counselor who’s “outside the situation” is they don’t know your friends or your family and don’t have opinions about how you should be living your life.
This means it can be easier to open up and tell them things you might not tell other people. You don’t have to worry about them being judgemental. What you say to them won’t leave the room, except for very particular situations where they fear for your safety or are legally obliged. Check out confidentiality for more information on this.

They also have experience dealing with loads of different problems and are pretty unshockable. If you have particular concerns, there are also counselors who specialize in specific issues.

Some of these specialty areas includes:-

mental health issues
addiction (drugs, alcohol, gambling)
sex and sexuality
family issues
eating disorders
pregnancy
family issues
money and housing worries
school and careers
abuse

Talking is fun

The Online World

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On the Internet, socialization refers to the ways that people communicate and the methods they use to do so. Socialization describes the customs, quirks and language unique to a particular culture. The Internet, while involving millions of people from countless different countries and backgrounds, has developed some cultural quirks all its own.

Methods
The Internet offers many different ways to socialize. Email is a simple form of one-to-one communication. Instant messaging programs offer more immediate forms of chatting, while video call software allows users to socialize visually, not just through text chat. Evolving technology means that new ways to communicate online are constantly developing. For example, Facebook — the world’s largest social network at the time of publication — includes elements of text-based, photo sharing, private message and instant messenger forms of communication.

Behavior
Online socialization requires a computer or Internet-enabled device such as a smartphone. Online socialization doesn’t necessarily lead to fewer real-world relationships. Some evidence suggests that Internet users are more likely to belong to a group and be actively involved. For example, 69 percent of Internet users attended an event or meeting in the previous month compared to 54 percent of nonusers, according to Pew Research Center data.

Culture
Like the offline world, Internet socialization involves its own culture and subcultures. Internet “memes” occur when an image, phrase or video is shared rapidly through the social Web. The meme then becomes a reference point for Internet users. Other forms of Internet culture include the shorthand expressions used in chat rooms and social networks. The term “LOL” for example — meaning laughing out loud — developed from Internet socializing in forums and instant messaging.

Impact
Facebook has more than 800 million active users in 2012. The microblogging platform Twitter has 100 million, while the business communication network LinkedIn claims 64 million users. Internet socialization involves a huge number of people worldwide. Many American users consider Internet socializing as having a positive impact. For example, a 2010 report by the Pew Internet and American Life Project found that around 85 percent of respondents to a survey considered that by 2020 they see the Internet as a mostly positive influence on their social lives.

Opentalk International

Simple Art of Talking and listening

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  • Set aside time for talking and listening to each other.
  • Listen to your children when they want to talk, have strong feelings or have a problem.
  • Be open to talking about all kinds of feelings, including anger, joy, frustration, fear and anxiety. Talking about feeling angry is different from getting angry, though. Learning the difference is an important step for a child learning to communicate.
  • When talking to your child, try to remember how it was when you were a child and how you were generally attracted to those people who really listened to you. After all, children think differently from grown-ups. There are a lot of things they don’t know and a lot of things they don’t have the words to talk about.
  • Let your child finish talking and then respond. When listening, try not to interrupt or put words in your child’s mouth – even when your child says something ridiculous or wrong or is having trouble finding the words. Children appreciate this as much as grown-ups!
  • Use language that your children will understand. Sometimes we forget that children don’t “get” everything.
  • Watch your child’s facial expression and body language. Listening isn’t just about hearing words, but also trying to understand what’s behind those words.
  • To let your child know you’re listening, and make sure you’ve really understood, repeat back what your child has said and make lots of eye contact.
  • Show your interest by saying such things as, “Tell me more about …”, “Really!” and “Go on …”. Ask children what they feel about the things they’re telling you about.
  • Avoid criticism and blame. If you’re angry about something your child has done, try and explain why you don’t want them to do it again. Appeal to their sense of empathy.
  • Work together to solve problems and conflicts.
  • Be honest with each other.
Uncategorized

Communication Hacks

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1.  Listen, listen, and listen. People want to know that they are being heard. Really listen to what the other person is saying, instead of formulating your response. Ask for clarification to avoid misunderstandings. At that moment, the person speaking to you should be the most important person in your life. Another important point is to have one conversation at a time. This means that if you are speaking to someone on the phone, do not respond to an email, or send a text at the same time. The other person will know that she doesn’t have your undivided attention.

2.  Who you are talking to matters. It is okay to use acronyms and informal language when you are communicating with a buddy, but if you are emailing or texting your boss, “Hey,” “TTYL” or any informal language, has no place in your message. You cannot assume that the other person knows what the acronym means. Some acronyms have different meanings to different people, do you want to be misunderstood? Effective communicators target their message based on who they are speaking to, so try to keep the other person in mind, when you are trying to get your message across.

3.  Body language matters. This is important for face-to-face meetings and video conferencing. Make sure that you appear accessible, so have open body language. This means that you should not cross your arms. And keep eye contact so that the other person knows that you are paying attention.

4.  Check your message before you hit send. Spell and grammar checkers are lifesavers, but they are not foolproof. Double check what you have written, to make sure that your words are communicating the intended message.

5.  Be brief, yet specific. For written and verbal communication, practice being brief yet specific enough, that you provide enough information for the other person to understand what you are trying to say. And if you are responding to an email, make sure that you read the entire email before crafting your response. With enough practice, you will learn not to ramble, or give way too much information.

6.  Write things down. Take notes while you are talking to another person or when you are in a meeting, and do not rely on your memory. Send a follow-up email to make sure that you understand what was being said during the conversation.

7.  Sometimes it’s better to pick up the phone. If you find that you have a lot to say, instead of sending an email, call the person instead. Email is great, but sometimes it is easier to communicate what you have to say verbally.

8.  Think before you speak. Always pause before you speak, not saying the first thing that comes to mind. Take a moment and pay close attention to what you say and how you say it. This one habit will allow you to avoid embarrassments.

9.  Treat everyone equally. Do not talk down to anyone, treating everyone with respect. Treat others as your equal.

10.  Maintain a positive attitude and smile. Even when you are speaking on the phone, smile because your positive attitude will shine through and the other person will know it. When you smile often and exude a positive attitude, people will respond positively to you.

Talk Science

Why talking is important

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The problem with problems is that they don’t come one at a time. They generally appear in clusters and sometimes they even have puppies. When one is taken care of, another pops up to take its place, and you wonder to yourself, “What did I do to deserve this?”

No, it isn’t Karma-you aren’t being punished-it’s just life. Combine the economic woes that we can’t seem to fix, issues that arise in any normal relationship, plus the unexpected upsets that besiege our day, and it’s understandable that there will be times when your mood reaches a low point.

There’s no quick fix or Pollyanna affirmation that’s going to change things. The truth is that you have to trudge forward until you can make them change. Perhaps someone else can help, but chances are they can’t take away your troubles.

A lot of people think that there’s a magic bullet that could make it all better. Well, it can help you feel good when someone touches your heart, but on the other hand, if you are struggling with personal or professional problems, they can be a burden on a relationship-especially if you refuse to talk about it.

Not wanting to look bad in the eyes of the person you admire may keep you from sharing what’s on your mind. The truth is that if someone loves you, he or she will help you deal with your dilemmas. Talking about it can help shed light on how to get through a problem. That’s also how therapy works.

You may find that brainstorming with another person or even a group will help you find new ideas to help you move forward. When you know someone has your back, that emotional support can make all the difference.

If you have been sitting on your stuff to the point where it’s starting to hurt, it’s time to let it out. How you choose to do it is up to you, but just keeping your pain inside will eventually lead to some kind of a meltdown.

Learning that it’s okay to talk about our problems can feel a bit like a trip to the dentist. You know that the discomfort will stop once you get the tooth fixed, but you don’t want to go though the process because it hurts too. And sometimes, with emotional issues, you may be embarrassed to share what’s really going on for you. That’s why it’s so important to talk with someone who is comforting and nonjudgmental.

There will always be problems in our lives, but sometimes we don’t have the capacity to handle them all by ourselves. Getting a 360-degree view is impossible when all you can see is what’s going wrong. And talking with another person can give you perspective.

Just know that you can minimize your problems by discussing them with those you trust. Give your pain a voice, and let someone listen. You will be amazed at how much weight will be lifted off your shoulders.